Songkran! or How To Get Water Into Every Orifice

Even if you've never been apart of New Years Eve in a big city, or a huge festive citywide celebration like, say, Mardi Gras, you've probably seen pictures or heard friends' stories of debaucherized revelry that would make Dionysus himself proud. So, imagine a scene like that, people swarming the streets, traffic backed up for miles down every street, music blasting, booze flowing, laughter and smiles abound. Now, imagine that scene taking place in a country whose national countenance, for the most part, could be called reserved or diffident at best. Now, imagine experiencing this festive scene from the cockpit of a 1969 Burmese Army Jeep, right-side steering wheel, left-side gear-stick, customized stereo system, no windshield, and all kinds of personality. Now, imagine this 3 DAY!! holiday scene with buckets upon buckets upon water-guns upon bottles upon hoses upon buckets of water coming at you non-stop from every which way, with every man, woman, child, monk, police-officer a fair target (no one is safe!), and you've just imagined my new favorite holiday: Songkran, the Thai New Year. If there's one thing I bring home from this trip, it will be the water-throwing ways of this crazy-ass holiday. America was made for this shit, what with our love of giant water-parks and slip-and-slides, and July 4th seems like the perfect holiday to add aquatic silliness into the mix. So, next 4th of July, if you get a bucket of ice-cold water down your previously dry backside, it's all out of love!